"Who's Sorry Now?"

What an excellent song to practice getting that 'Oooo' sound working as it should. I still can't seem to keep my tongue where it belongs while keeping my mouth a bit more open in that sound. I'm still enjoying the challenge, though. Interesting side fact: this song was, indeed, a song of the twenties, even though we know it primarily from Connie Francis's version about thirty-five years later.

When I first went to see a counselor in college, I was reluctant, to say the least. I saw no reason why someone else needed to help me think, or figure anything out. I don't remember why I went, in the end, but I did go, for the ten sessions I was allowed. As a bonus, my counselor was a good-looking man, easy on the eyes. I liked him, and it was worth it, it did help ease me.

It would be nice to say that I learned a lesson, and didn't resist when the need came again to seek help. But I did. I still hated the whole idea of needing help in this way, or perhaps in any way. With the help of a friend, this time, I found a therapist who was a good fit. She worked with prisoners, and people working through active addictions, and it was comforting to know that nothing I could say would shock her. I was familiar with the process of facing my demons, I knew that the things that I resisted with that certain flavor of denial were the things that I most needed to face. I understood that other things might exist to be dealt with at some point, but I could have faith that I would be aware, on some level, of what I needed to accomplish here, with her assitance.

When it was time to finish that time, I knew it. It was also good to know that if she had disagreed with that, she would have let me know. I did take a break, and then I was very relived to go back, when life threw me a curve. I was doubly happy to finish again, to be able to say 'I'm cured!'.

Lately I've been thinking that the need is coming again, and it's good to know that there's someone out there who would again take me in, listen to my stories, try to understand, and tell me that sometimes it's really ok to ask for help just because it would be easy, or even fun. I don't have a need to be in therapy all the time, it is good to take myself out for a solo spin for long periods of time. I find that talking to a professional can make me a little less brave or creative when it comes to addressing issues with my loved ones. But I am so glad to know that this is something I can do, a place that I can go. I figure the next time I have to go I can direct her here, for a beginning understanding of where the journey of the recent past has taken me.